Millions of couples are around the world and waiting for the answer to this very question: how long should you wait for the man to propose and what is the average time to get engaged? Months? Years? The answer is different for every single couple out there, of course. However, there might be a good timeframe in which to suggest that it happens if you are so set on tying the knot.
Average Time to Get Engaged
For one thing, the average length of a romantic relationship in the western world lasts less than 3 years. It is during that time, at some point, that the topic of marriage needs to come up, be discussed, and then a proposal should happen. Thus, the data seems to suggest that the optimal time for couples to get engaged is roughly around 2 years of being together.
Why should it take so long? Many factors are driving this conclusion for couples in the world today. For one thing, people want to make sure they are with someone that is going to last. There is no need to seek marriage just for the lustful aspects of it, as some did in the past. Instead, couples wish to ensure they can be with that person, live with them, survive a few fights, and still want to be with them after months and years. Many of the Millennials and Generation Z grew up in homes with single parents, and they don’t want to end up with their children bouncing between two homes. This is why more and more modern couples prefer to enter the marriage after 5 years of living together and even more.
Moreover, people have more ways to delay pregnancy than ever before. Some couples would simply like the opportunity to establish themselves as adults in a working relationship before they commit to being with someone. All in all, there are many reasons that people wait a long time to propose.
After around 1.5-2 years of being with someone, you should have a good idea of their life goals and if they align with yours. This is why the relationship experts state that this is the perfect time to propose. If you are with someone for closer to 3 years, it’s a good idea to pop the question, ask about it outright, or prepare to move on and be with someone that has a long-term outcome in mind.
Also, bear in mind that some couples start talking about marriage after a few months of being together. There is no specific time by which to judge every relationship! You have to determine how long you’re willing to wait for the prospect of marriage.
Life Without Marriage: How Is It Like?
It is possible to be in a relationship with someone and live without marriage. Some couples don’t see the need to get legally entangled with a person if they’ve already been together for so long. After all, many of the “adventures” of marriage are happening in regular relationships.
Everything from having children, moving in together, and buying a property with one another as all the couples do, is occurring outside the confines of marriage. So, the question also must be asked, why do you need to get married anyway? Does it make your relationship less valid?
On the surface, no. Being married doesn’t change the day to day interactions that you have with your romantic partner. Also, there is the benefit of saving money on rings, etc. That’s not even to mention the stress that goes into planning a marriage ceremony. And lately, a lot of modern couples prefer to better save money for journeys rather than spend on expensive ceremonies.
However, marriage does have some legal benefits that you can’t get when you’re simply “dating” someone. After all, when you’re living with someone for months, or even longer, without being married, you’re still considered single. You don’t get the tax benefits or the ability to file together.
More importantly, not being willing to make a demonstrable declaration of your love can be quite detrimental to your relationship. Sometimes, people don’t want to be with someone if they’re not willing to make a dedication to one another in the form of marriage.
Thus, you can avoid marriage, but you should talk it over with your partner beforehand, so it doesn’t become a point of contention, as such a nonchalant attitude ruined a lot of strong couples.
Marriage is a difficult topic for most of the couples. However, it’s something that is good to talk about before you reach the three-year mark in your relationship. In fact, if you’re going to get married, it will most likely be in the works before then. While all the couples are different, your partner might be expecting a ring before then.